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  • Heidi Moore

Yeah, but why?....


Last month I was asked to do an interview for a YouTube channel called "Bitches of Horror". In my interview I decided to talk about what inspired the story behind my feature film "Dolly Deadly". I wanted to keep it short so I only went into it a little bit, but really I could go on and on about it. It's something that really bugs me and I hope this movie inspires other people to think about it more; if they don't already.

In society there are expectations on how men and women, boys and girls should act. How they should dress, what they should be interested in, what they should grow up to be. I will admit, when I was little I watched She-Ra not He Man, and had no interest in anything targeted to boys. I wouldn't even wear pants because I thought the front part that sticks out in the front was for "weiners" to go. Everyone has their preferences, and that's fine, but if someone likes things that aren't the norm for their gender, society seems to have an issue. And they are generally pretty vocal about it.

Once when I was at the thrift store I found a pair of tap shoes; they were just the right size for my youngest son(Who was 5 at the time). They were girl shoes, but I figured, What's the big deal? They're frikkin tap shoes. I imagined him having fun with them taping randomly in the kitchen, in the bathroom, wherever. I brought them home and he loved them, he even wore them to the grocery store. One day he wore them to the park across the street which I thought was cool. Well, a little later he came in the house to change his shoes. I asked him what was wrong and he said a dad at the park made fun of him for wearing girls' shoes and he wanted to take them off. I was floored that a fucking adult was making fun of little kids, but then I realized that's actually where a lot of ridicule comes from; it's where kids learn it. I remember my mom wouldn't let me hold my hand a certain way because "that's what gay guys do", and you know the classic line everyone says to little boys, "quit acting like a girl". I guess these are things people have always grown up hearing, and don't really think twice about, but I wonder if they realize how damaging it can be to say that crap to children.

Imagine growing up being different and having the adults in your life constantly tell you that's not how you're supposed to be. It happens every day to so many people and they are expected to grow from it. And yes, some people take that abuse and turn it around into strength. But what if hypathetically you aren't able to do that? What if it fucks with your head so much that you just snap? Not everyone is tough enough to survive put downs and ridicule every day from the people who are supposed to love them. This is what "Dolly Deadly" is about.


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